


Halloween Fun Times

by suzannahbee123



Category: Angel: the Series, Blade (Movie Series), Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Lord of the Rings (Movies), Twilight (Movies), Vikings (TV)
Genre: Crack Crossover, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, F/M, Multiple Crossovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-08 10:27:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16427582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suzannahbee123/pseuds/suzannahbee123
Summary: All your favourite characters come to your door on Halloween asking you to choose your favourite. What would you do?





	Halloween Fun Times

Y/N hated hallowe’en. Well, not really. More, she hated the drama that came with having two best friends who were obsessed with going out for hallowe’en to party and dressing up in outrageously sexy costumes and then demanding Y/N tell them who looked better.

After 6 years of friendship, Y/N had had enough and said that this year, she would be staying in with Netflix and Amazon Prime and she would look at the pictures posted on instagram and judge then.

It was 20.00 on hallowe’en evening, with her snacks surrounding her and a bowl of candy waiting for any kids who came to her door, Y/N settled down to watch Scream. She figured she would follow that up with A Nightmare on Elmstreet. Then she was going to follow it up with the orginal IT witth Tim Curry.

Aaaaand, if she felt like it, she would throw in Alien too. Hell, she didn’t have to work tomorrow, screw it.

 

Y/N was so comfy, her favourite t-shirt, leggings and sleep socks on, big black hoodie on standby for later if she got chilly, she snuggled down into her cushions, pulled the blanket around her legs and happily watched, barely even registering that her eyes were growing heavy….

 

_Knock knock knock_

Jerking upright, Y/N growled to herself and paused the TV, “Damn kids. Shit was just getting good.” She mumbled as she made her way to the door. Throwing it open, candy bowl in hand, she said, “Okay, who wants- oh my God!”

Stood on her doorstep was Hawkeye and Legolas. Not kids dressed up as Hawkeye and Legolas. Not adults doing fantastic cosplay as Hawkeye and Legolas, oh no! The genuine articles from the films that Y/N may or may not have repeatedly binge watched.

Okay, fine. There was no maybe about it.

“Hey, listen. We gotta serious question and only you’re gonna be able to answer.” Hawkeye announced, utterly serious, striding into her hallway.

Legolas followed him in, “A most important matter must be addressed.” His bright blue eyes constantly searching.

“Well sure, I mean- wait. What? How…”

“No time darlin’!” Hawkeye yelled, “This is life and death!”

“Indeed.” Legolas murmured dangerously.

_Okay. I’m dreaming clearly. Just go with it._

“Right. What can I do?” Y/N asked.

The two archers looked at each other then, as if they had practiced, reached behind themselves and pulled put their bows and held them in their hands.

“Who’s is better? I mean, mine’s modern. I can collapse it to use as a stick. It’s multipurpose Y/N!”

“Mine was made from the wood of Lothlorien trees. It is the most exquisite bow to be made by the hands of elves…” Legolas stared dreamily at the thing and Hawkeye rolled his eyes.

“Oh right. So…when you said life and death you meant… this?”

“Yeah! It’s important.” Hawkeye bit out impatiently.

Idly scratching her head, Y/N shrugged, “Um…Legolas.”

“What?!”

“Well, it’s more traditional and-“

“Thank you, fair mortal. I shall not forget you.” Legolas barely smiled but it still hit Y/N like a sucker punch. He then dramatically swept from her hallway and back out of the door.

“Great. Now I gotta listen to the other guys givin’ me shit for this.” Hawkeye grumbled as he too, left her house.

“Oh. Okay. That was fuckin’ weird.” Y/N shrugged and went back to her film.

***

In a blink of an eye, her door knocked again.

_Kids? Please kids. Or not?_

“Alright. I’ve had enough. Who’s the hottest vamp?”

Y/N stared in shock. Angel, Spike, Eric Northman and Bill Compton stood there. Just four hot (though technically cold) Vampires stood on her doorstep. NBFD.

Angel had his arms crossed impatiently, Spike stood nonchalantly next to him, cigarette hanging from his mouth. Eric and Bill were stood next to them but separate.

“Ummm. Really?”

“Don’t look at me love. I already know who you’re going to pick.” Spike winked.

Eric ran his hand through his hair, “Oh. I wouldn’t be so sure. This beauty looks like-“

“Angel.”

All four faces registered pure shock before suddenly, “Oh yeah! Who’s the best now William the bloody?! Who’s hotter now Viking vamp?! I don’t even care about whoever you are!” Angel was so smug it almost hurt. Then he started dancing. _Oh…god._

“Oh bloody hell. D’you know what you’ve gone and done now you silly bint? Oh bollocks. Never mind.” Spike huffed and stomped away, Angel swaggering behind.

“Well. At least I didn’t lose to the one who bleached his hair.” Eric growled before walking away and not looking back.

“Ma’am.” Bill shrugged.

Y/N shut the door and blinked, taking a deep breath as she did so. “Okay. Movie. Yes.”Turning back to the TV, Y/N clenched her fists when the door knocked again. “Oh for the love of…” Y/N grumbles abruptly came to an end when she saw who was on the other side of the door.

“Oh my God!! It’s you! And _you_!!” Buffy the vampire Slayer and Blade the vampire Hunter stood on her doorstep.

“Hi! That’s us in a nutshell!” Buffy walked past Y/N into the hall, Blade following stoically behind her.

“Okay, so, here’s the sitch. Angel just told me that you can help with this sort of thing, and we really need that kind of help.”

“Yeah.” Blade growled, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Oh, yes, I’ll help!”

“Okay. Who looks better? Big bad Blade or lil’ old me?” Buffy asked eagerly.

Y/N stared. Buffy was in red leather pants and a black top under a black leather jacket.Blade was…Blade. Fierce and just as intimidating.

“My look is better for hunting vampires.”

“We already talked about this Blade! Who needs a bullet proof vest to kill vamps?!”

Y/N bounced on the balls of her feet in excitement listening to the two of them bickering.So engrossed she was, Y/N didn’t notice the bronzed haired, mopey faced boy enter her house.

“Hey, am I late for the sexiest vamp bit?”

“What is _that_?” Blade growled as Buffy looked bemused.

Cringing, Y/N muttered, “He’s Edward Cullen. A new type of vampire…”

Edward just stood there frowning.Buffy and Blade shared a look before, simultaneously, Buffy pulled her stake out and Blade whipped out his katana.Buffy plunged said stake into Edwards sternum and Blade cut his head off and Edward turned into sparkly, glittering dust/ash.

“Y’know what? Never mind.” Buffy shrugged, making her way to the door.

“Yeah, we’re both badass motherfuckers blondie.”

They got to the door and Buffy casually shoved Blade out of the way so she could get out first.

“Bye!”

Blade coughed and straighened. “Later.”

“Oh wow. Just…oh wow.”Y/N closed the door and went back to the couch, equal parts excited and dreading who might come next.

***

Y/N thought maybe that had been her lot after Scream had finished and she was half way through A Nightmare on Elmstreet. Deciding that maybe that was for the best, there was only so much pop culture any one person could handle in one night after all, her front door was thrown from it hinges as a large long haired brunette man and a slightly smaller framed blonde haired man were thrown against it. Getting to their feet, they pulled large axes from the leather and furs they were wearing and gave almighty war bellows at the open doorway.

“What the fuck?!” Y/N yelled in fury, “Who the hell are-”

Y/N didn’t get to finish the sentence as an even larger blonde man in a cape came flying through and crashed into them.

“How dare you claim kinship to Thor?! You’re not worthy!”

 _Wait…that’s Thor. And they’re…_ Ragnar Lothbrok and his brother Rollo came back to their feet, fury in every line of their faces.

“Brother!” Rollo yelled, completely ignoring Y/N, “You go for his legs and I shall attack his head.” Ragnar grinned maniacally and nodded. Then they charged and the three of them fought some more. Y/N groaned in exasperation as she saw _two more_ bloody people stroll through her broken door.

“Tee hee hee… they look like they’re having fun Loki.”

“Well, my brother always did find a fight rather than discussion most agreeable for his nature.”

Loki, the God of Mischief and Floki the ship builder came and stood either side of Y/N, watching the carnage calmly.

“Can either of you…?” Y/N trailed off when she saw almost identical wicked grins cross their faces.

“Oh no my dear.” Loki said softly, cocking his head as he looked at her.

“No. It’s the way that family line settle disagreements. Ours are far more… amenable shall we say Loki?”

“Oh yes Floki, so much more can be learned by talking.” Y/N sighed. “I forgot you two are supposedly related.”

Floki twiched his hand and giggled again, cheering on Ragnar and Rollo.Loki bent and whispered in Y/N ear, “Do not fret Y/N. All shall be back as it was when we leave.”

“Don’t you want to know who I think is better? Isn’t that why you’re here destroying my home?”

“Oh, we already know Y/N.” Floki smirked over his shoulder.

“Our little secret though dear.” Loki winked conspiritally at Y/N. Some time later, all five men left. Thor, Ragnar and Rollo yelling and joking jovially whilst still completely ignoring Y/N.

Loki and Floki turned one last time and, with matching grins, snapped their fingers and immediately fixed her home.

“Thank y-” They had gone and disappeared.

***

Y/N was now done with these visitors. She just wanted to watch her goddamn movies and eat her snacks in peace so when her door knocked she threw the blanket off her legs and stormed to the door ready to give whoever the fuck it was a piece of her mind.

All argument left her though when she saw Captain fucking America in his stealth suit and Bucky fucking Barnes in his Winter Soldier murder outfit stood there arms crossed and looking hotter than the sun.

“No! Oh hell no! I’m not picking between the two of you! No!” Y/N’s arguments stopped when Steve said firmly, “Trick or Treat”

“What?”

Bucky stalked in and went behind her as Steve moved in front and closed the door behind her, “I said, Trick or Treat? You’ve had a hard night. But don’t worry darlin,”

Bucky wrapped his arms around her middle, “Either way, we’re gonna make you _scream_ doll.”

“Treat.” Y/N almost yelled as she rolled her head so that Bucky could get better access to her neck and dragged Steve closer to her front, “Then boys, I have a trick or two for you.”

***

Y/N woke up alone in bed and stared up in disbelief at the ceiling. Pulling her phone towards her, Y/N frowned at the screen before shrugging and opening up the Tumblr app.

 _Oh you filthy minded women will_ love _this…_


End file.
